my name is lisa. i am 3 years post gastric bypass surgery. my starting weight was 272 and i weigh today 164. I am married and have two beautiful children.  Pretty sure I struggle with a food addiction. other people I know don't obsess about food like i do, man that's hard to admit for some reason. for me its not an excuse just a truth that i need to embrace.

    just starting this blog to maybe be more accountable and it seems like the bandwagon i should be on:)  (as you've already noticed i did not take typing 101 we moved around alot so i got out of it somehow and so my typing skills are somewhat lacking and not up to par with my mother who could out type anyone i know lol.)
   Anyway i struggle with keeping this weight off on a daily basis and feel like it might help me to write down this crap in my head. 
   Today I started off good as usual had my protein shake then a banana, which i have been craving lately. I have a bit of carbohydrate phobia so i am trying to get away from the "carbs are bad" train of thought because i have a hard time believing that a damn banana or oatmeal is bad for me!  And so i come into work and the guy in the lab brought donuts which i spotted right as i walked thru.....great!  So come into my area put up my things and start thinking about the donuts and how good they are ect ect yes basically obsessing about the damn things! I'm not addicted to cigarettes(anymore) or alcohol (anymore) just FOOD! So incomes "fuck it mode" and i go get a cake donut it was very tasty and instantly think why in the hell did i eat that and start calculating how much exercise i might would need to do to "get rid of those 300 or so calories."  not smart and i KNOW this but its what i do.  
   I go on about my day. For lunch i packed left overs of a very delicious dish i found @ bariatricfoodie.blogspot.com  its called taco casserole OH SO GOOD MY HUSBAND EVEN HAD SECONDS!  its very good and healthy :)  did i mention it was yummilicious?  So i heat and eat my lunch and head over to target.  Got the kids some things and then really wanted chocolate! i KNEW i would do this because i always want something sweet after i eat, mainly chocolate, so i should not have gone to target, but i did and ended up in the snack section and got some flips chocolate covered pretzels, ate half and threw the rest away(which was really hard to do- throwing away food is so very difficult for me especially if it tastes good) because if i didn't i know i would have ate the entire bag, which was supposedly 8 servings!  so i now am up to mmmm bout 750 calories that i need to burn by today's end.... great! that seems attainable and unattainable at the same time since i am locked in to taking the kids to the water park after work today and as much as i can sit here and say oh i can swim it off.  I know i will want to sit and relax and read my book while they play and slide and swim.... well see tho... I will try.  I need to flex my self control muscle alot more than i do, I know i can I just don't for what ever reason id like to blame it on i just don't!